Zapped Out

It’s a diseeeeeeeease
Clinging to me
Messing with my thoughts
No confidence except with small talk clerks

It’s a zapper
Jolting my braaaaaain!
Zap! So that’s the answer
No control around these weed enhanced jerks

It’s a love
It’s a hate
It’s a problem to contemplate

It’s what I need
It’s what ruins
Every day

Oh, why can’t you just fix everything
Or stop causing all these problems?
To stay stoned forever?
To cut it off? To balance it back?

Like that time I did it before acting class
You know that class with all your peers
That were all friends with each other?
And you volunteered with a burst of confidence
Jumped up on stage
Formed the shape of a canon
And burst butterfly-style out
SFX full volume
And splattered all your pumpkin guts onto the first row

Or like that time you did it leaning halfway out your window at college
Thunder thunder outside keeping me in
Happy laughter thunder downstairs keeping me in
And the smoking would be fun if you were alone and had less regrets about it
But having fun is no fun if pretending to be asleep with the lights off is a requirement
Well maybe except if it’s normal sleeping hours and your mom is knocking right when YouJizz
But when it’s your pals trying to get “The Phantom” out of his room
And Phantom tells himself to pretend like he TRULY can’t hear the knocks
But he knocks the volume of the PBS Frontline documentary up a few notches
And tries to focus on the rise of ISIS but can’t stop cursing himself
For his inexplainable fear of opening the door and crumbling under the intense pressure of modern alpha-comedy-male-happy-happy conversation
Phantom then tries to believe that tomorrow night will be different and he’ll definitely hang then
And he’ll be able to handle his weed if he just focuses on the positive and forgets the immense psychological situation known as “science” that he is currently in

It’s like everything I see is my future movie
Like that first time at home
Laughing with past friends about
Shia LeBeouf and how you thought you were him in a movie
And the cop pulled us over to his car and we laughed and it was awesome

And it still is
But sometimes it is not

Oh when does depression end
and when do I become free again?
Like I Always Was?
You have these hiccups all the time and
you never think you can get out of them

But you will
Just Love + Listen
–What’s that song you made up @ the factory?

Love, live… FIND IT, PHANTOM!

Looove, Live,
Jam it out… Communicaaatinggg…


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