All I Do

 to remember forever
 a thing ive said
 in the past:
 i used to say all
 the time
 that all i do
 is think of
 things to say
 to people.
 and in some
 repeated convolusion,
 taking breaks to remember
 old laughs
 on repeat
 and words from friends,
 i need,
 at least,
 for
 it all
 to be confirmed genius
 now.

 i bet ill go get my MFA
 at brooklyn college.
 ill have a balcony at home
 overlooking a dirty
 grey avenue,
 ill pick up smoking
 and get as high as ive
 always wanted,
 and ill keep driving
 the taxi,
 and will buy things
 randomly,
 of quiet necessity,
 for my friends.
 here you go, here is
 your favorite record
 and a record player
 and maybe ill even
 fall in love!
 with a tiny brunette
 with huge white
 eyes! and still ill
 just keep trying
 to prove my genius
 with some skewed and strained
 form of listening.

 and at the parties
 with warm Boyhood
 lighting and laughers in
 sweaters, ill convince
 myself
 im fine
 saying nothing at all

 because there is bukowski
 and here i am now, lets pray
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